Comments on: Musings on vacations and flings… http://karenrayne.com/2009/07/17/musings-on-vacations-and-flings/ Sat, 11 Feb 2012 02:35:50 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.7.1 hourly 1 By: Alice http://karenrayne.com/2009/07/17/musings-on-vacations-and-flings/comment-page-1/#comment-4867 Alice Mon, 20 Jul 2009 01:30:50 +0000 http://karenrayne.com/?p=674#comment-4867 C4bl3Fl4m3, I had the same experience in high school! Well said about the fears of social ostracism of potential dates. I never had summer flings myself since my parents never let me out of their sight, but I did relish the general freedom from my social status. C4bl3Fl4m3, I had the same experience in high school! Well said about the fears of social ostracism of potential dates. I never had summer flings myself since my parents never let me out of their sight, but I did relish the general freedom from my social status.

]]> By: Margaret Pevec http://karenrayne.com/2009/07/17/musings-on-vacations-and-flings/comment-page-1/#comment-4849 Margaret Pevec Fri, 17 Jul 2009 18:32:25 +0000 http://karenrayne.com/?p=674#comment-4849 I was wondering where you were, Karen, and as usual, your blog today brought up some wonderful new thinking for me. Reading the above comment has also prompted some memories. I remember, during the summer before my senior year in high school, having a fling with an out-of-town boy who was vacationing at a resort area near my home. He was a college boy, very sweet, and we had a great connection for, what? A few days perhaps. I remember going to his hotel room and changing my clothes for my senior picture. We didn't have sex, but we must have kissed. It was exciting, adventurous, and gave me a small taste of the larger world (he being from the Pittsburgh area and in college, while I was from rural Ohio). It was all good. My mom didn't have a clue, as I had shut her out of any involvement years before when she made it clear her only response to me with boys would be negative and punitive. We learn so much about ourselves through our relationships, as you so aptly pointed out, not only as young people, but all our lives. I could also relate to the other commenter about meeting people outside my high school community could be so freeing...I could be whomever I chose. I hope there are more comments on this issue. I'd love to hear more stories about vacation flings. I was wondering where you were, Karen, and as usual, your blog today brought up some wonderful new thinking for me. Reading the above comment has also prompted some memories. I remember, during the summer before my senior year in high school, having a fling with an out-of-town boy who was vacationing at a resort area near my home. He was a college boy, very sweet, and we had a great connection for, what? A few days perhaps. I remember going to his hotel room and changing my clothes for my senior picture. We didn’t have sex, but we must have kissed. It was exciting, adventurous, and gave me a small taste of the larger world (he being from the Pittsburgh area and in college, while I was from rural Ohio). It was all good. My mom didn’t have a clue, as I had shut her out of any involvement years before when she made it clear her only response to me with boys would be negative and punitive. We learn so much about ourselves through our relationships, as you so aptly pointed out, not only as young people, but all our lives.
I could also relate to the other commenter about meeting people outside my high school community could be so freeing…I could be whomever I chose. I hope there are more comments on this issue. I’d love to hear more stories about vacation flings.

]]> By: C4bl3Fl4m3 http://karenrayne.com/2009/07/17/musings-on-vacations-and-flings/comment-page-1/#comment-4847 C4bl3Fl4m3 Fri, 17 Jul 2009 17:52:06 +0000 http://karenrayne.com/?p=674#comment-4847 Something important that you didn't mention about flings... sometimes flings are one of the only places that the teen can FIND people who are interested in them. I grew up in a small town in rural Pennsylvania and was the "loser" kid in my high school. A number of my peers picked on me mercilessly, and the others stood idly by watching. Even the peers that left me alone or were somewhat friendly to me... they knew that to date me would me utter social ostracism and exposing themselves to brutal verbal and emotional abuse. In short... I HAD no one to date in HS. I found the few partners I had during that period over the Internet. But on summer vacation, I would sometimes have the rare opportunity to meet up with people who didn't know my social status back home. These "flings" for me usually only lasted a day or so, or perhaps even a few hours (before I had to go), but to meet someone who was interested in me, who would kiss me, who actually LIKED me... it was wonderful. And you know, I didn't even think about these people until now, but I still have them in my mind, the boys that liked me for who I was and that kissed me oh so yummy! Something important that you didn’t mention about flings… sometimes flings are one of the only places that the teen can FIND people who are interested in them. I grew up in a small town in rural Pennsylvania and was the “loser” kid in my high school. A number of my peers picked on me mercilessly, and the others stood idly by watching. Even the peers that left me alone or were somewhat friendly to me… they knew that to date me would me utter social ostracism and exposing themselves to brutal verbal and emotional abuse. In short… I HAD no one to date in HS. I found the few partners I had during that period over the Internet.

But on summer vacation, I would sometimes have the rare opportunity to meet up with people who didn’t know my social status back home. These “flings” for me usually only lasted a day or so, or perhaps even a few hours (before I had to go), but to meet someone who was interested in me, who would kiss me, who actually LIKED me… it was wonderful. And you know, I didn’t even think about these people until now, but I still have them in my mind, the boys that liked me for who I was and that kissed me oh so yummy!

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