Needing some poetry to do the teaching…

With all the bad news about adolescent sexuality in general and sex education in Texas specifically (see here and here to get the point), I feel it is time to sit down and get serious about this stuff.

At least three Texas public school districts use the Wonderful Days sex education curriculum, which goes above and beyond the typical, boring sex education classroom activities that permeate this topic to introduce ideas through easy-to-remember verses like this:

“If a woman is dry, the sperm will die. If a woman is wet, a baby she may get!”

<<NOTE: This remainder of this post is for much-needed comedic relief only!>>

Brilliant!  I think we need to focus more of our collective attention on condensing and reducing all our primary topics and messages in sex ed to simplistic little diddies!  My husband and I will get us started, but please add your own ideas in the comments section.  Remember: we can only make a serious difference in our young people’s lives if we all throw ourselves into the work of educating them as fully as possible.

For Abstinence Only:

  • “If you don’t want a kid, then keep your crotch hid.”
  • “If you think babies are dirty, then don’t get too flirty.”
  • “Wait ’till you marry, to touch parts that are hairy.”
  • “If you try up-the-butt, you’ll be labeled a slut.”

For Comprehensive Curricula:

  • “Give same-sex a try, and the stork will not fly.”
  • “Before you do oral on your man, be sure and get a dental dam.”
  • “Tend to her clit, or your woman will quit.”
  • “You can buy condoms regardless of your age, so don’t let that keep you in your cage.”

Now add on!  There are lots more topics that need more tending to, including but not limited to: anatomy and physiology, gender, the pill, the entire range of STDs, and, of course, saddlebacking.

About Karen Rayne

Dr. Karen Rayne has been supporting parents and families since 2007 when she received her PhD in Educational Psychology. A specialist in child wellbeing, Dr. Rayne has spent much of her career supporting parents, teachers, and other adults who care for children and teenagers.


  1. Karen, I’m going to link to a poem I wrote (I should resist the temptation, but I can’t). I’d rather link to it than reproduce it here because it contains one use of the F word — although not gratuitously. The poem is here. It’s not a one line ditty though.

  2. If you don’t want a baby, always use a condom, instead of maybe.

  3. Listen now so you have heard — for bondage have a safety word!

  4. […] her clit, or your woman will quite”.   So, if you’ve got a moment, you might want to head on over to her post and lend a hand!  She’ll appreciate it! Posted in Adolescent Sexuality, Sexuality […]

  5. Learn to honor the power of ovulating
    fertility can be liberating

  6. Good light bright sex education there.

    Sex is no sin, as long as you do it sincerely.

    SEX is simply SElfeXpression.

    To create a baby God has given you a homework of joy and you call it sex; answer God’s call always.

    A girl is half god; a boy is another half god; may you both join together to whole God.

    God hates violence, so do your sex in silence and reverence.

    God has blessed you with joy in sex so that may you not feel bored and lonely on this earth.

    More later!

  7. “If a woman is dry, the sperm will die. If a woman is wet, a baby she may get!”

    Why don’t you ask my embryo about that one….

  8. I clicked on that “Wonderful Days” link and found a list of suggested essay topics. Here’s a good one:

    “Secondary Virginity: How do we teach rebuilding and renewed purity for those who have made mistakes while not inadvertently implying to virgins that they can violate expected standards and then rebuild purity without consequences?”

    Anyone up for some essay writing?

  9. I was reminded of a quote I read as a teenager:

    Children in the front seat cause accidents, accidents in the back seat cause children!

  10. The only way to cure the perversion of sex and to reverse back to the cleaner sane sex is to TALK SEX!

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